Created: September 7, 2009

What a title huh? Today in NC it has been raining and not to mention its Labor Day so the gym was closed. So as any normal human being would do, I've had the day to self reflect.
I won't make this that long. Sometimes this milestone just becomes a place for me to vent to.
I'm going to 20 years old in 12 days. :-) exciting, yes and no. I've waited many years to be out of these so called teen years but not sure why. When I look back, I've done nothing but fail myself. I've failed in not going to college right after highschool. I've failed in waiting this long to lose weight. I've failed in losing friends, and not being the greatest friend to come too. I've failed ME.
Like any 15 year old I had the dream of becoming a singer like the infamous Britney Spears. She was and still is someone i not necessarily look up to, but I asprie to have her life. After getting told time and time again, You can't sing, give up theres millions upon millions of people that want that dream....I gave up. I used to sing on my karaoke machine that my mom bought me for hours at a time in my bedroom to my imaginary audience, and i loved the way it felt. If i missed up on my pitch, id start the whole song over with.
Still to this day i wonder what it may have been like to have gotten those vocal lessons that i asked for for years, and where it may have taken me.

Weight: As i updated my front page a while ago, i really got to thinkin of how there were days when i could sit there and eat junk food out the ying yang lol. I tried dieting, but when your that young, you really have no idea what dieting is. So here i am today, almost 20 years old and looking at myself in the mirror still sometimes brings a tear to my eye. I have a trainer now and someone who has made my food plan for me, Toni Warrick and Bill Porter of maxmuscle in Fayetteville. I'm not used to having someone want to help me. I should have lost more weight than i have in 6 months, but i'm Tiffany. I dont stick to things when i see myself getting results. I think oh i can do it on my own now. ugh.

I'm done with that girl, and im done with the excuses. I'd love to be a fitness model when i get all this unwanted and nasty fat off my body. who knows what this life has in store for me. i could go back to that 15 year old with a dream of being on stage in front of millions or just being on stage showing what hard work and dedication do for your body. <3
Are you ready world??